A formulaic approach to human relations

In this post I aim to develop a set of ‘principles’ according to Ray Dalio that posits the basic components of a solution that I hope with constant refinement, will serve me and the readers of this article. I have learnt the importance of integrity when it comes to dealing with people in your life. If you only make sure that you deal with people of high integrity, you ensure a smooth, good quality of life. Recognize that relationships with family, friends, spouse, business partners/colleagues are the source of fulfillment . Conversely, with people of poor integrity, or dysfunctional character traits can lead to misery in one’s life. The key is in judgement. How do you use all the available information from the person that you have in front of you to come up with an accurate assessment of character.

Scuttlebutt with people, observe traits such as vanity, narcissism and the dark triad. As Charlie Munger posits: avoid ‘toxic people’. By avoiding, one can prevent such calamities like misery and harm that these people can cause. So I have come to develop a simple acid test when it comes to developing relationships in my life across the spheres of business relations, friendship and intimate relationships to be as follows:

Can I trust this person and do I admire this person?

And if yes, what qualities do I admire in him?

 

I feel that this is the basic premise of human relations. We ought to deal with people we admire and avoid the ‘toxic’ people. Mastery of this comes in the judgement of people, how do you accurately judge a character?

 

For friendship a simple acid test:

When I share good news, is he happy for me?

 

I want to have as many people that I admire around me, as friends, colleagues, and more. Integrity is the foundation for any relationship and without which no working relationship can form.